Mental slump

[VALJ]

For the first time in 14 years, I find myself in one heck of a mental slump this season.  Our association commissioner observed our game on Friday, and while I thought we had a pretty good game, he didn't see it the same way.  I found in my game last night (working R) that I was second-guessing myself, and overthinking things, and distracted, and made a couple of mistakes, and let the coaches get to me.  I'm working as an F tonight, so I'm hoping that being able to focus on just one part of the game instead of thinking about having to administer the game will help. 

I'm also seriously considering turning back my one game next week so I can have a full week without a game - I've worked a lot more this season so far than I have in years past, and I'm wondering if maybe I'm suffering from a bit of football fatigue.  Does anyone have any suggestions for getting out of a slump like this?

[TXMike]

Are there other things going on in your world that are wearing you down? Maybe it is not the football. 


Or maybe it is time to read through "Doc" Johnson's essay again:

Why We Officiate
by Curt "Doc" Johnson

Why?
It's standing on the field listening to the National Anthem with your eyes closed and your hat over your heart, thanking God for your life and your country.
It's walking onto the field and seeing the relieved look on the face of a coach that knows he's got a great crew tonight.
It's the long drive to the game reviewing every detail of rules and mechanics and yet having time for a joke or two.
It's walking around the school or stadium looking for your locker room because the AD forgot to have someone meet you.
It's every story that begins with, "remember when..."
It's the genuine look of concern on your crew mates faces when one of your brothers has fallen, and the round of laughter shortly thereafter when it's obvious he's alright.
It's officiating a game shortly before and after your father dies because he taught you what honor is and to always do your duty.
It's sitting silently at the an association meeting listening to others figure out a complicated ruling and then having them turn to you and ask, "is that right?"
It's leaving your family for a 3 day clinic, and your wife supporting you in that decision and your dream, because she understands that if "it's not good for me, then it's not good for us."
It's bringing an extra pair of socks along just in case somebody forgets theirs.
It's meeting someone and finding out he's an official and immediately becoming friends because of that fact.
It's working through the sore muscles, bad knees and the smell of "Ben-Gay."
It's lost job wages, small game fees, and that smile on your face when someone says, "Your just doing this for the money."
It's the feel of your heart pounding before the coin toss as you reach into your pocket for the coin that isn't there.
It's finishing a 3rd grade game and having a 9 year old run up to you and sincerely say, "Thank you, Mr. Official."
It's hearing that a coach was putting you down behind your back, and that another official defended you by saying "he's the best official in the state."
It's having to "buy the first round" because you're the first one to get dirt on your knickers during the game.
It's that "one play" that happened years ago that your crew keeps talking about. You all know the one.
It's the 8 x 8 foot dressing room they give you with a shower head that barely works.
It's leading by the example of sportsmanship, and hoping some of that will rub off on players, coaches and other officials.
It's knowing that no matter what happens during the game, you'll get it right.
It's also knowing that the greatest sign of wisdom is realizing that you don't know everything.
It's Snickers bars, beef jerky and sodas made from fermented grains.
It's rule books, discussion boards, countless e-mails and good friends whose faces you have yet to see.
It's striving to be both a scholar of the rules, and a philosopher of the spirit of the game.
It's being perfect the first day and working to improve everyday thereafter.
It's knowing that you're a part of a tradition of honorable men, names of whom are mostly forgotten or weren't really known to begin with. But who still did their thankless jobs for the love of the game, and because it was the right thing to do.

It's all these things, and many, many more I'm sure, that keep all of us coming back for more, year after year, and wondering why . But then you step on the field again,...... take a deep breath ......and ask yourself, "where would I rather be than right here right now?"

[bama_stripes]

I'm also seriously considering turning back my one game next week so I can have a full week without a game - I've worked a lot more this season so far than I have in years past, and I'm wondering if maybe I'm suffering from a bit of football fatigue.  Does anyone have any suggestions for getting out of a slump like this?

That may very well be the ticket.  I took last week off to travel to meet my new granddaughter, and am really looking forward to being back on the field this week.

[Ralph Damren]

Working our beloved game is a great hobby and should never become a chore. Being F tonight may help without the added pressure of being a white hat. Take a step back, take a deep breath, but please don't give up this great hobby and your postings here. You're a very valuable and enjoyable3 part of this forum. - Ralph

[VALJ]

Oh, it's nowhere near that bad to make me say "that's it, I'm hanging it up".  But I think you may have hit the nail on the head - last night felt like a chore, not a hobby, and I didn't enjoy it (nor was I looking forward to it, to be honest).  This has probably been my busiest season so far in years (the last time I worked this much was at least a decade ago, before my daughter was born).  After tonight, I've got a game next Wednesday, and my next game isn't until the Wednesday after that - calling out of next Wednesday's game and getting almost two weeks off might be just what I need to recharge.

[NoVaBJ]

VALJ, I don't think you're in my association, but I took this season off for largely this reason.  Demands of raising a toddler and having a day job that requires a lot of international travel just made it no fun.  The commissioner's insistence on assigning everyone to a quota of youth games didn't help either.

I've been doing soccer instead--the games start and end on time, I get exercise, and when I get yelled at because I mess up or someone mistakenly thinks I mess up, I can't tell, because thus far, soccer yelling does not break football background noise.

[AlUpstateNY]

Taking a break from anything, is rarely a bad idea.  Although absolute perfection is often an expectation, of what we do, we all should realize, and accept, it's a pursuit we'll never attain.  That's not to say we abandon the pursuit, even though reality teaches the more we learn, the more we realize how much we have yet to learn.

It's never easy to have flaws, be they real or just someone elses perceptions, pointed out to us, but they can be very useful wake-up calls.  Reality also tells us, some days we're just not as crisp as others, but being aware of that can help remind us to regain our focus (even when we think we're already crisp).

Hopefully tonight's game will be just a little better than last week's, but not quite as good as next week's, and we'll do our own honest critique and consider our own evaluation.  It's really hard to actually BS that face in your mirror, and he can give you honest feedback, IF we really want to listen. 

Of all the people, and there will always be many, giving advice on how we can do what we do, better, very few have a clue what needs to be done, or how best to do it, and learning to ignore the clueless while focusing on the very few who actually know what they're talking about is an ongoing challenge.  It's worth remembering, very few get to do what we do, and most of us are far more critical of ourselves than the loudest voices offering "advice".

We are usually better at what we do, when we're allowing ourselves to enjoy, what we're doing, so it's important to appreciate where we are and what we're able to do, while we're actually doing it. 

Like the dog chasing the mechanical rabbit, Perfection is NOT INTENDED to ever be achieved, satisfaction is derived from the effort put into the chase.  That doesn't mean we shouldn't enjoy the chase, or understand that although we'll NEVER fully reach that goal, we might get pretty close - if we keep chasing.

The next Wednesday game may seem like just another Wednesday game, but it helps to remember, for those playing that game it's a really BIG DEAL, and they're counting on you to be at the top of YOUR game.

[HoustonUmp]

Maybe you should consider a slumpbuster as a solution.     

[HLinNC]

VA- I've been down since about Week 3 for a variety of reasons, some related to officiating, some related to work issues.  Given the next two seasons I'm going to be sitting out on Fridays, I've actually been mulling over hanging it up totally.

Last night I was assigned to a HS in a county that I worked many games out of my prior association.  I had not been assigned there in 7-8 years.  We had about a half hour lightening delay to start and our trip was delayed due to traffic issues in the Asheville area.  We arrived late so we pre-gamed in the van but the weather delay allowed us time to relax.  My regular crew was busted up for this game so it was just me and the R together with 3 other vets.

All my old chain crew was still there.  My sideline had a young, first year head coach who is polite and respectful, never got on my back or in my ear the whole game.  In fact he has a great sense of humor.
The first half ended 0-0.

  I felt like we were crisp, good ball handling, fouls were limited but correctly called, enforced properly.  Physically I felt great, moved well, no aches or pains til a kid got turned over at the sideline and I caught a cleat in the mouth.  The AT checked me out and saw no blood and all my teeth in place.  I shook that off quickly.  Final was 21-0 with my sideline being the happy side.

Long van ride home but I felt the best I've felt this year.

[NorCalMike]

Sometimes during the middle of the season, I feel this way. Usually occurs because of a combination of on field and off field pressure. I don't know how many times I've told my wife I just feel like quitting. But each Friday night I back out there and I find that once the game starts I forget about the crap going on and get into the game.

Last night I was kind of dreading the game all week. We were working a school known for problems with players, coaches and fans. Working LJ in the JV game. Coaches were actually really good. I had a lot of fun as the coaches were joking with each other and the kids during the game. Turned out to be one of the most enjoyable game all year. Varsity game was pretty good too.

So what I am saying is no matter whats going on, go out and enjoy yourself. Forget about the crap and have fun.

 

[VALJ]

I'm thinking it may be white-hatting that's the problem.  I got to work F Friday night, and even though we had a monsoon at a couple of points during the game, that's the best I felt after a game I worked all year.  I'm going to tell my commish on Tuesday at our weekly meeting that I think I just need to move downfield permanently.  That said, I did decide to give back my game on Wednesday as well.  That will give me almost two full weeks without a game (last Friday to next Wednesday) to recharge mentally, and we're going out of town Friday evening for Mrs. VALJ's birthday, so I won't even be thinking about football for all that time other than checking in here. 

Thanks for letting me vent, and for the suggestions, guys.

[JasonTX]

I'm thinking it may be white-hatting that's the problem.  I got to work F Friday night, and even though we had a monsoon at a couple of points during the game, that's the best I felt after a game I worked all year.  I'm going to tell my commish on Tuesday at our weekly meeting that I think I just need to move downfield permanently.  That said, I did decide to give back my game on Wednesday as well.  That will give me almost two full weeks without a game (last Friday to next Wednesday) to recharge mentally, and we're going out of town Friday evening for Mrs. VALJ's birthday, so I won't even be thinking about football for all that time other than checking in here. 

Thanks for letting me vent, and for the suggestions, guys.

Maybe you should take her to watch a game.  You'd be surprised about how much relief it is to just go out to a game and stand on the sidelines and just watch.

[HLinNC]

Maybe you should take her to watch a game.

OMG NO!!  My son is playing JV's right now.  She (Mrs. HLinNC) lives and dies with every play.  It is the end of the world.  I've tried explaining its a long 4 quarters and she needs to relax and pace herself.  It doesn't work.   

Away games, I feel duty bound to sit with her. Home games, I grab a drink, a bag of sunflower seeds and sit by myself on the top row just to the right of the press box.