The game is late in the forth quarter. Home team scores and I let fly with two flags. This is my discussion with the White Hat.
"What in the world do we have here?"
"Provided there are no other flags"
"There are none"
"I have a touchdown by Blue with clean hands, eight yards deep in the endzone I have a dead ball, personal foul late hit by #46 white."
"Good call I saw that"
"Thank you"
"What about the other flag?"
"While I was admonishing #46 for his lack of concentration and the poor position he put his team in because of the late hit, #10 White unsnaps his chinstrap and declares his desire to have illicite sexual relations with me"
"He what?"
"Oh. it gets better, when I inquired about his true intent, he then removed his helmet and expressed his desire for me to have illicite sexual relations with my Mother."
"I think it's time the young lad goes home."
"He has already been advised that he gets to go home early this evening"
"You realize that I have officiated for more than 20 years, and you have just described exactly what was said without actually using the word. No one can dispute what was said, I can't wait to see the coaches reactions to this."
The Home Team Coaches were howling after we explained the penalty and the ejection.
The Visiting Head Coach said, "Well you just took away my main argument about your being able to use the word and not him. There is no doubt about what he said, I can't blame you for sending him home early. Good Job !"