When a coin toss goes bad

[Bubba Ump]

Had an interesting coin toss in the first round of playoffs a few years ago and it's bothered me ever since.  A very good team from out of the area vs a team I knew well.  The visiting team sends out their 4 Captains to meet the home team's Captains and they are glaring at them through the entire sportsmanship speal.  The Referee tells them to shake hands and bring their teams out and the visiting team just turns away and jogs back to their sideline.  Leaving the Home team with their hands extended.  The Referee tells me that was strange but acted like it was no big deal.  I was HACKED.  I went over to the visiting Head Coach and told him what happened.  He barked, "We don't shake hands." Not wanting things to escalate I calmly walked to my position for Kickoff and worked the game.  So, NFHS keeps sending me these links that are all about "Sportsmanship and the lack thereof"  Got one today and that made me think of this.  How I would / should I handle this? If it happened now I would throw my flag, my spare flag, my hat and steal one of the referees flags so I could throw it too.  Kick the head coach out and kick from the 3 yardline.  Not sure if this is the correct thing to do but I think I would be justified by the NFHS in my actions.  What I'd really do is yell for the visiting Captains to return and tell them what I'm about to do if they don't shake hands.  If they don't comply I'd kick out the Head Coach and we'd kick from the 25.  You thoughts and opinions of this are how I become a better official...

[HLinNC]

My understanding of our state's policy is to flag the HC of the team(s) for USC.  Except while we were playing under Covid rules, then nobody was supposed to shake hands.

[dammitbobby]

Yeah I'd be peeved at that too.  At a minimum, to avoid having to throw a flag, I'd make the captains come back out, plus their coach, and (calmly) explain to him that on this field, in games under my jurisdiction, we practice good sportsmanship, and if he chooses to walk off without his captains - and him - shaking their hands, he's gonna get one on his counter and he's gonna have to be the very best of saintly choirboys, he'll be on a VERY short leash the rest of the night.  No reason to put up with that.

[fudilligas]

don't know of anything in the rules book that says shaking hands is mandatory.....however, don't know of anything in the book that says you have to warn the players or coaches before throwing a USC flag....could have a night of flying yellow hankies

[riffraft]

don't know of anything in the rules book that says shaking hands is mandatory.....however, don't know of anything in the book that says you have to warn the players or coaches before throwing a USC flag....could have a night of flying yellow hankies

Personally I don't think I would flag it since there is nothing in the rule.  I kind of put this in contrast with wrestling, where it is in the rules to shake hands both before and after the match.

Figure if the football powers that be wanted to make it mandatory they would make it mandatory.

All that said I would definitely have my eyes open for improper behavior on the part of that team and have very little tolerance for any deviation of proper conduct.

[Legacy Zebra]

I may be in the minority here, but in my opinion people make way too big of a deal out of the coin toss/handshake. Flip the coin, get their choices and get out. They don’t care about your names. They’re not listening to your sportsmanship lecture. In fact, nothing you say to them is being processed. All they care about is the coin toss itself and which unit is taking the field.

The fact that some people would eject a head coach before the game even starts just because four teenagers didn’t shake hands is a little bothersome. When a coach goes for two late just to put 50 on the scoreboard, you’re not tossing him. When a coach leaves his starters in with a big lead, you’re not tossing him. When a coach tells his team to “go kick their BUTT”, you’re not tossing him. So why are we worried about a handshake?

[Etref]

Exactly
Just be aware that things may get chippy early and take control of the game

[dammitbobby]

So why have the coin toss at all then?  Let's flip a coin in the locker room and be done with it.  Or even better, just make it like baseball:  home team receives first half, visitors receive second half.  Done. 

My reasoning is that if that's the way the team is coached, then you are very likely going to have problems.  And I am a firm believer that one of the goals of football - of sports, in general - is to teach and model proper sportsmanship and teamwork.  Nobody is expecting golf-like levels of integrity or politeness here (and if you do, you will be sorely disappointed.)  It may not be a specific rule to shake hands, but it's a traditional part of the game and allowing that to occur demonstrates to players that officials, like the other team, can be treated with disrespect, with no consequences. 

from the Statement on Sportsmanship, FR-10: 
The rules committee reminds head coaches of their responsibility for the behavior of their players before and after, as well as during, the game. Players must be cautioned against pre-game unsportsmanlike conduct on the field that can lead to confrontation between the teams. 

While that was most likely written with pregame warmup shenanigans in mind, it absolutely applies here. 

[Covid 22]

Do the handshake and your intro before the coin toss. 

Gentlemen, shake hands and introduce yourselves.   I am your R and this is the U.   You are chosen to be the leaders on the field by your coaches and I expect your help if someone gets out of line.   Blah, blah...

Then toss the coin. 

If they don't want to shake hands again when the opponent sticks out their hand it is not a problem for me.  It is an indication that we need to keep a close eye on their sideline because this this is very much a reflection of the coaching staff.   

[Legacy Zebra]

The point of the coin toss is to determine which team will kickoff and in which direction. That’s it. Anything beyond that is extraneous. If they shake hands, great. If they don’t, I don’t care. And as I listed above, there are plenty of things that fall under that sportsmanship reminder that we don’t (and shouldn’t) penalize a team for. It’s traditional for a team who is winning late to take a knee to end the game. But if that team lines up and throws a deep pass for another TD, we wouldn’t flag that as unsportsmanlike. Should a team refusing to shake hands make your antenna go up for future shenanigans? Absolutely. But in my opinion, this is not something we should flag immediately.

[dammitbobby]

Not flag immediately, sure, but I'd still bring them back out, like I mentioned above, to reiterate the sportsmanship aspect of the game.

[Legacy Zebra]

Do the handshake and your intro before the coin toss. 

If they wouldn’t shake hands after the toss, why would trying to make them do it before the toss change anything?

Gentlemen, shake hands and introduce yourselves.   I am your R and this is the U.   You are chosen to be the leaders on the field by your coaches and I expect your help if someone gets out of line.   Blah, blah...

They know you’re the R because you’re the one with a white hat and a coin. Beyond that, it means nothing to them. And they don’t care about your spiel about leadership. 99% of the time they’re captains because of their onfield position or their seniority. Them being one of the four guys at the toss typically has very little to do with their level of accountability.

Then toss the coin. 

If they don't want to shake hands again when the opponent sticks out their hand it is not a problem for me.  It is an indication that we need to keep a close eye on their sideline because this this is very much a reflection of the coaching staff.

My coin toss “speech” is simply “Gentlemen, this is the coin.” Show both captains heads and tails. “[Visiting team], you’re the visitor, so you’ll call the toss. What is your call? [Home captain], what did he say? [Repeat call]”. That’s it. If it’s a postseason game or something special I’ll add “Welcome to [special game]” at the beginning.

And as far as bringing the captains back out, you’re wasting so much time for something that is just going to make that team (or both) start the game mad at you. You’re going to get both sets of captains out of the tunnel, walk them back to midfield, and make them shake hands? Are you just gonna wait them out until they do it? Now everybody is mad at you because you’ve taken what should amounted to a verbal warning and turned it into a 10 minute grandstand. Not to mention that we haven’t even kicked off yet and they already have the perception that you’re over officiating.


All of this is simply my opinion. I just think we waste time and energy on things that don’t affect anything. Do what works for you or what your boss tells you.

[dammitbobby]

You're not wrong.  Maybe what I said would be taking it too far.  That said, I'm not comfortable leaving that level of contempt and disrespect for officials and the other team out there, without being addressed in some way.

[Legacy Zebra]

That’s the thing though. Addressing an issue shouldn’t automatically mean flagging it. And this applies to the game as a whole, not just this situation. Too many times we think a flag is the only option. Our flag should be the last tool we use to address an issue, not the first. The more we can defuse without a flag, the better our game management will be.

[fudilligas]

Personally I don't think I would flag it since there is nothing in the rule.  I kind of put this in contrast with wrestling, where it is in the rules to shake hands both before and after the match.

Figure if the football powers that be wanted to make it mandatory they would make it mandatory.

All that said I would definitely have my eyes open for improper behavior on the part of that team and have very little tolerance for any deviation of proper conduct.

not saying to flag it at the toss....only that i would not hesitate to throw USC or PF on that team where i would otherwise be apt for a "talk to"

[JasonTX]

My coin toss “speech” is simply “Gentlemen, this is the coin.” Show both captains heads and tails. “[Visiting team], you’re the visitor, so you’ll call the toss. What is your call? [Home captain], what did he say? [Repeat call]”. That’s it. If it’s a postseason game or something special I’ll add “Welcome to [special game]” at the beginning.

Mine is the same.  Someone once told me that they gave the "you're the captain" speech and when they were done, they asked the kids to repeat what was said and they had no clue.  So next game the R asked, "Why is the bologna round and the bread is square?".  Apparently, they were able to repeat that.  The point is these kids just want to get the coin flipped and line up and start hitting each other.

[Covid 22]

Well Mr. Legacy, I was raised and trained a little different.    I always did the handshake first and never had it denied. It did not matter if it was a 7th grade "b" game or a playoff game with Patrick Mahomes.  I introduced "I am Mr. Smith and the U eating his is Mr. Jones".   Please have your ball carriers get the ball to him after every play.  Depending on the game, I might add a few things. 

Bottom line, I wanted them to know right up front that we knew who they were and we respected the fact that they were chosen to be out there.

If I could get back in shape, I would LOVE to go at it again.   

[Legacy Zebra]

Actually, I think you would find you and I had similar training early in my career. I used to give a big monologue, too. But, like Jason, I realized through experience and advice from mentors that I was wasting my time. You can introduce yourself at the toss and by midway through the first quarter they won’t remember either one of your names. And how many times do you honestly think the captains go back to the tunnel and tell their running backs and receivers what you said about getting the ball back to the umpire? The answer is never. They’re more concerned about pumping up the team for the run-through and getting ready for kickoff. And since you mention it, it maters even less in middle school games where most of the time they don’t even have “real” captains. 99% of the time they’re captains because it was their turn to do the toss or they raised their hand the fastest when we told the coach we were ready for captains.

Again, you do you, but generally the only person who cares about about whats being said is the person saying it.

[ilyazhito]

If it seems to me that the captains refused to acknowledge the other captains (handshake, fist bump, wave, etc.) on purpose, then each would get one unsportsmanlike conduct foul, and a 15-yard penalty would be enforced on the kickoff (NCAA). If it was NFHS, then the UNS penalty would be multiplied by the number of captains there. That said, I'm not a white hat, so I don't think I'd have to deal with these shenanigans. I'm a deep guy, so I really only escort the captains to the Referee. They come back on their own.

[AlUpstateNY]

Again, you do you, but generally the only person who cares about about whats being said is the person saying it.
[/quote]

Agree its important that "You do you".  An important part of this "Meeting of the Captains" is to clearly establish WHO is in charge of the game about to be played.  What you say and/or how you say it, is entirely UP TO YOU, what matters is that the Captains understand that YOU ( and your crew) are in CHARGE - NOT their Coaches, NOT their parents, NOT the spectators.

Best to keep it simple, but they need to UNDERSTAND who they need to listen to regarding behavior, and/or interaction with their opponents.  If (YOU decide that same message needs to be given to either/both Coaching Staffs), best to do that BEFORE the game starts, rather than after something STUPID happens.

[KWH]

That must have been a very uncomfortable dilemma.
When the captains come out for the coin toss I simply begin with; "Gentlemen shake hands an introduce yourself!"

Quite frankly, I have never had anyone refuse to do so any any level in 45 years?

I end with, "OK Men, shake hands again and lets play football."

Other than the fist bumps during COVID, never been an issue.

This team needs to be reported to your state association and if you are writing something;
take a look at page 102 of the 2021 Rules Book for very helpful wording.

[RMR]

I ask themselves to introduce themselves before the toss.

A couple of years ago I had a kid who just wanted to stare at the other team's captains like he was all hard or something.

I told him that if he didn't have the maturity to serve as a captain I could just send him back to the sideline and have the coach send me another player who was mature enough to accept that role. It embarrassed the hell out of him and he then shook with the other team's captains.

I also had my H inform his coach what happened and how we dealt with it.

His coach thanked me at halftime.

[Ralph Damren]

When we added 1-1-5 back in 2001, we Mainers put our thinking caps on. We decided to require the head coaches to come with their captains to the coin toss. My spiel once at midfield :

"Coach and captains of the Warf Rats, please greet the coach and captains of the Clam Crunchers...."

...Coaches shake hands with each other, then with the opposing captains. The captains follow.

"Coaches and captains do you agree to play by the NFHS Sportsmanship Code ?"

...The response is usually : "AYUH, 'spect so!"

"Coaches, you may return to your sidelines. Captains, you were elected not because of your athletic abilities but because of your leadership skills. Will you agree to help us keep your teammates under control ?"

...The response is usually : "AYUH, 'spect so!"

(COIN TOSS)

Game clocks are set to hit 0:00 at 10 minutes prior to game. Player intros, Star Spangled Banner, Coin Toss... we always start on time (except Parents Night).

[AlUpstateNY]

It's amazing how often simple common sense, and the ability to "act like the adult" can eliminate really stupid and/or childish behavior.

[Bubba Ump]

"Our flag should be the last tool we use to address an issue, not the first."  Golden!  One of my points to this scenario, that only happened once in my long career, is that we are constantly being bombarded by "sportsmanship" reminders from the NFHS.  I was glad to see the NFL cracking down on it this year.  There was a clear division in the NCAA conferences on how they dealt with sportsmanship.  Just my observation, but I thought there was a lot more trash talking in the SEC then the MAC. (there were a lot more cameras in the SEC)  The SEC also made a lot more money.  We are being constantly reminded by the NFHS to enforce Unsportsmanlike Fouls in order to promote the true meaning of extracurricular activities.  We don't want to be uniform police, rules interpreters for the head coach, the "Bad Guy." 
One solution would be that the NFHS come up with some type of chain in command.  From the national level, to the state, to the region, to the section, to the association.  Where, in order to retain officials, someone above the schools would do something about "incidents."  I'm not talking about ejections,  I'd love to type a simple email to explain that the reason the game was delayed 10 minutes was because the Head Coach insisted that the defensive holding call enforcement was 5 yards and an automatic first down.  Someone would get a hold of the schools administration and someone in the coaches chain of command would ask the coach why he didn't know the rules of the sport he's being paid to coach.  Maybe there is such a chain of command and it's been hidden from me for 30 years.  I think we all should know who to report to if we see anything unsportsmanlike and knowing something will be followed up on.  This would help officiating get out of the recruiting rut we are in.  Last years season started with a touchdown reception and the receiver standing over the defender dropping the ball on his helmet.  Flaggs flew from many directions.  The head coach then screamed at me, "You're the reason I have only 23 players on my roster! You make it no fun!"  New rule for 2023: Stupidity is an automatic ejection.  Recess is coming my friends and the NFHS needs to take a different approach if they want to stop it...